The XKCD Bot @xkcd@mastodon.xyz

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https://xkcd.com/1998/

Our customers keep sending us their personal information, even though we've repeatedly asked them to stop. The EU told me I'm the heir to some ancient European throne that makes me exempt from the GDPR, but we should probably still try to fix that.
https://xkcd.com/1997/

Support your local paper, unless it's just been bought by some sinister hedge fund or something, which it probably has.
https://xkcd.com/1996/

Wait, sorry, I got mixed up--he's actually almost 50. It's the kid from The Karate Kid who just turned 40.
https://xkcd.com/1995/

I was just disassembling it over the course of five hours so it would fit in the trash more efficiently.
https://xkcd.com/1994/

Fixating on this seems unhealty. But in general, the more likely I think a crash is, the less likely one becomes, which is a strange kind of reverse placebo effect.
https://xkcd.com/1993/

During launch, in the event of an unexpected sensor reading, SafetySat will extend prongs in all directions to secure itself and any other cubesats safely in the launch vehicle until the source of the problem can be determined.
https://xkcd.com/1992/

Mathematicians give a third answer on the vertical axis, "That question is poorly defined, but we have a sub-field devoted to every plausible version of it."
https://xkcd.com/1991/

It's probably just me. If driving were as dangerous as it seems, hundreds of people would be dying every day!
https://xkcd.com/1990/

"Ugh, TMI." "Yeah, that's some tantalizing meat info."
https://xkcd.com/1989/

All services are microservices if you ignore most of their features.
https://xkcd.com/1988/

The Python environmental protection agency wants to seal it in a cement chamber, with pictoral messages to future civilizations warning them about the danger of using sudo to install random Python packages.
https://xkcd.com/1987/

I'm not a lawyer, but I believe zones like this are technically considered the high seas, so if you cut a pizza into a spiral there you could be charged with pieracy under marinaritime law.
https://xkcd.com/1986/

Hi, I'm your new meteorologist and a former software developer. Hey, when we say 12pm, does that mean the hour from 12pm to 1pm, or the hour centered on 12pm? Or is it a snapshot at 12:00 exactly? Because our 24-hour forecast has midnight at both ends, and I'm worried we have an off-by-one error.
https://xkcd.com/1985/

"But there are seven billion people in the world! I can't possibly stop to consider how ALL of them might interpret something!" "Ah, yes, there's no middle ground between 'taking personal responsibility for the thoughts and feelings of every single person on Earth' and 'covering your eyes and ears and yelling logically correct statements into the void.' That's a very insightful point and not at al...
https://xkcd.com/1984/

I found a copy of The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, but the idea of reading it didn't spark joy, so I gave it away.
https://xkcd.com/1983/

The wars between the "OTHER PRIMATES OPEN THEM FROM THE SMALL END" faction versus the "BUT THE LITTLE BIT OF BANANA AT THE SMALL END IS GROSS" faction consumed Europe for generations.
https://xkcd.com/1982/

Want to feel old? The 'want to feel old?' factoid meme dates back to around 2011, closer to the Bush/Kerry election than to today.
https://xkcd.com/1981/

I take it Narnia doesn't have Cinnabons? Because if you can magic up a plate of those, I'll betray whoever.
https://xkcd.com/1980/

HISTORIANS: We've decided to trim the past down to make things more manageable. Using BCE/CE, would you rather we lose the odd-numbered or even-numbered years?
https://xkcd.com/1979/