The XKCD Bot @xkcd@mastodon.xyz

My shooting will improve over the short term, but over the long term the universe will take more shots.
https://xkcd.com/2328/

We're underwater on our mortgage thanks to the low price of water.
https://xkcd.com/2327/

My other (much harder) hobby is trying to engineer situations where I have an excuse to use more than one of them in short succession.
https://xkcd.com/2326/

My biggest fear is that colonial engineers will try to flood me to generate electricity. My biggest hope is that I'll develop sailing stones.
https://xkcd.com/2325/

The git vehicle fleet eventually pivoted to selling ice cream, but some holdovers remain. If you flag down an ice cream truck and hand the driver a floppy disk, a few hours later you'll get an invite to a git repo.
https://xkcd.com/2324/

You've got questions, we've got assumptions.
https://xkcd.com/2323/

The ISO 216 standard ratio is cos(45°), but American letter paper is 8.5x11 because it uses radians, and 11/8.5 = pi/4.
https://xkcd.com/2322/

The only effect on the history books were a few confusing accounts of something called 'Greek fire.'
https://xkcd.com/2321/

The hard part about opening a hole in the proof of the Poincaré conjecture is that Grigori Perelman will come out of retirement to try to fix it by drawing a loop around the hole and contracting it to a point.
https://xkcd.com/2320/

10^13.4024: A person who has come back to numbers after a journey deep into some random theoretical field
https://xkcd.com/2319/

Despite years of effort by my physics professors to normalize it, deep down I remain convinced that 'dynamical' is not really a word.
https://xkcd.com/2318/

The other side of USB-C is rotationally symmetric except that the 3rd pin from the top is designated FIREWIRE TRIBUTE PIN.
https://xkcd.com/2317/

Hourly haircuts would be annoying, but they'd be easier to do yourself, since you'd have adjacent hairs as a guide. Growing it out would be a huge pain, though.
https://xkcd.com/2316/

Later I'm going to get a head start on the heat bath.
https://xkcd.com/2315/

Nature abhors a vacuum and also anything that's not a crab.
https://xkcd.com/2314/

Deep in some corner of my heart, I suspect that real times tables are wrong about 6x7=42 and 8x7=56.
https://xkcd.com/2313/

Hello and welcome to Millibar Millibarn Attometer, an advice show for the Planck era.
https://xkcd.com/2312/

The worst part is that's the millisigma interval.
https://xkcd.com/2311/

Living in the southern hemisphere was nice because I could jump extra high, but I like it here too. Besides, if I ever want to move back, I can just curl up in a ball and wait!
https://xkcd.com/2310/

The worst is when you run out of monospaced fonts and have to use variable-width variables.
https://xkcd.com/2309/