Pinned toot

Schrödinger's Boys are considered both back and not back in town

Pinned toot

An unexplored angle on Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is that Willy Wonka is clearly a genius, the finest scientific mind of his generation, yet he focuses almost all of his efforts on manufacturing candy.
The temptation of big profits in the multimillion dollar candy-sector under the candy-capitalist system has drawn him away from more worthwhile pursuits and possibly corrupted him into the weird, weird dude that he is

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Pinned toot

Mr Loggins, if you have intel relating to a so-called "Danger Zone" which could pose a threat to the safety of American citizens it is your duty to disclose its precise coordinates to this subcommittee

Pinned toot

If I was Scott Adams it would really piss me off that not many people seem to be naming their children "Dilbert"

Pinned toot

The reason airlines don't let you into the cockpit is because they're afraid you'll catch the pilot smoking all those cigarettes they told you you weren't allowed to smoke

Bing bong
I have scheduled this toot to tell you that in my timezone it is now 4 am.
What time is it where you are? I don't know, you fucking tell me, asshole
Bing bong

Thanks to the ability to schedule toots, the barriers to enlistment into the have never been lower!

It's impressive that animal crossing has so many fish and bug puns but somehow not a single one of them is satisfying

I'm afraid, Mr Bond, that in this particular case it do be like that

Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg is Will Riker's favourite book

Prime's doctors have stressed that Prime has mild symptoms, is well on the way to recovery, and may be out of the hospital tomorrow, and also that they've administered the transferal of the Matrix of Leadership.

Spoilers for the movie Inside Man 

What was the hole for? My dad is unconvinced by my theory ("shitting hole")

yeah linux is cool but does it have ransomware built in

jesus was actually just a reply guy for the old testament

Mastodon twinks? More like femboy tooters

Is this Gul David Warner's first interrogation? Picard is obviously extremely sleep deprived and he still plays him like a damn fiddle

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What is up with Captain Jellico and 1400 hours? Almost all of his deadlines are 1400 hours, he loves 1400 hours, he wants to marry 1400 hours

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A thing I like about Star Trek is how they talk about the transporter (an almost magical device that converters matter into energy and then sends that energy somewhere else to be reassembled) as if they're audio engineers trying to get a nice crisp sound on a recording ("boost the game on the matter stream" etc)

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i learned the difference between "desert" and "dessert" from an english teacher who told me the one with the double 's' indicates you want seconds

that shit worked incredibly well

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