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Manuela Malasaña

when i moved back to the states after having lived in spain for five years my spanish had a very madrizzzzzz accent. my first job was tutoring reading at elementary schools with spanish speaking 3rd graders. they had no idea what to make of my accent. a kid asked me if i was from peru, and i was like no? why? the kid was like, i don't know, you just seem to. peruvian accents are not like castillian accents at all so im still scratching my head on that one

was working with these 3rd graders on the first day, they were gettin' rowdy when i was trying to tell them something

i was shoutin ¡fijaos! ¡fijaos! nothin. must be a bunch of badly behaved kids i got here, i think. then i have an idea. ¡fíjense! all the kids suddenly quiet down and look at me. ah

i was very very careful and in a whole school year only once did i slip up and tell a bunch of 8 year olds to fuck their pencils

context: "coger" is to grab, to catch, to get, to pick up, and is versatile and has many uses -- in Spain. everywhere else...

ill have to fuck a taxi
fuck me that pen, would ya?
i gotta fuck some milk on the way home

@Xibanya oh wow I’ve definitely made that mistake before. what’s the right word outside of Spain? I vaguely remember a Spanish teacher using “recoger”

@noah agarrar, tomar, traer, depending on context

@Xibanya

"I want to catch that very attractive criminal"