@mperham I have come to understand that they believe our heads to be other cats while the rest of our bodies are furniture/can-openers that are somehow attached to the head (cat).

@mperham you're the human food supplier.

@mperham
I am sorry, you have no say in the matter. The cat has been with you so long and has done noticable improvement to you. You are now the cats property due to squatter's rights