Manuela Malasaña is a user on mastodon.xyz. You can follow them or interact with them if you have an account anywhere in the fediverse.
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AUTO TECHNICIAN: so for your oil change you can pick our regular oil, good for 3000 miles or 3 months, then there's our premium option, good for 6000 miles or 6 months, then our deluxe oil that also helps maintain the engine
ME: do you know who i am? show me the stuff you keep for your ..most valued clients
AT: maam those are all of our options
ME: *glances at bodyguards*
AT: *nervous* well since you asked *gets ruby encrusted cask from behind counter, takes out silk-wrapped bottle of motor oil*
@Xibanya actual quote from oil change tech (reading label on can) "hm, .946 liters, that liter is the heart of a good oil..."