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When an eyelash, evolved to protect your eye, falls INTO your eye? The greatest betrayal

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1st day on Mastodon: hi everyone, I'm interested in art, architecture, and cat pics!! 😊

3rd day on Mastodon: gonna find bigfoot and fuck him

Coworker: whatcha laughin at? πŸ˜„

Me, laughing again at @Thomas 's horrible thread about drinking Sonic like a coconut: nothing

Hey: you gotta work on your self esteem, friends

excited to bottle up roux mixed with seltzer water and sell it under the brand name ((Carbo)^2)nara

5 Google Searches for Happy People

1. happiness positivity and warmth
2. yep! i'm happy
3. happier than you
4. does it get any happier than this
5. how to be even happier recipes
6. be happier recipes ina garten

Smiling benignly while Robit froths at the mouth about something I've never paid any attention to

Friends: this person, who's almost never online, is the greatest!

Me: nice, I see they're talking about a subject I like, I'll chat with them

Person: [never responds]

Me: haha cool

MH mild - 

Hmmm yeah not gonna hold my breath for that 11-1 timeframe

Doing a thing I never do: choosing to take my glasses off and put my phone down and go to sleep

Feels weird

and I still think about it and I love Gritty

When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie 

Mischaracterization but also why I don't watch anime 

@Louisa he missed his chance. Should have done it when they were Boyz

Why does Mike, the deepest voiced member, not simply eat the other Boyz II Men

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