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imagine if you just ejaculated one enormous sperm

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"average person cums twice a week" factoid actualy just statistical error. average person doesn't cum at all. Spunky Georg, who lives in cave & blasts ropes over 10,000 times a day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

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"get some perspective!" i yell, tiny, or very far away

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wearing a shock collar that zaps me whenever i think of a good post

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ant 1: that ant is huge! it’s gonna eat the whole tree before my boy shows up! oh. phew! there he goes! alright, lemme hit up my boy. ant 2: hey Jessie! heard about the huge ant. how much of the tree is still there?? ant 1: James! you’ll never believe it! there’s 

have lived in the west country for a quarter of a century now. time flies.

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become fedi-famous to have people boost your posts and then immediately tell you to fuck off

have you ever wanted to attract the shittiest people possible? become youtube famous!

it's great and cool that youtube is a place to watch people's mental health decline over years

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OH luv. oh dear luv. oh bloody 'ell. that stinks!

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im giving up being an insufferable little freak for Lent. just kidding!!!! goblin mode for life, ride or die

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People who have to get up in the mornings to go to work: how long do you typically have between the time you get out of bed and the time you go out the door?

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Important PSA for people living in the US: The FCC has been forced to reopen public comment on the Net Neutrality decision following a court case by Mozilla. The influx of bots (suspiciously using the names of telecom subscribers) that were anti-Net Neutrality has caused this. The FCC is trying to bury this, and very few are reporting on it.
To (re)file your thoughts on the FCC's decision, go to fcc.gov/ecfs/filings/express. Proceeding 17-108 is Net Neutrality. This ends in March.

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internet of things-controlled "egg launcher" that launches eggs at cars that are idling within egg launching distance

you've heard of top gear, now get ready for bottom gear 😏

the ultimate clothe, the cargoed short

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"Hello" began as a shortening of "Hell no" for the natural reaction when someone tries to talk to you.

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Hell yeaH I'm a PAWG

Proud
Advocate of
White
Genocide

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